I like to imagine friendship is a walk in the park. That it is clean and encouraging and always leaves me feeling restored and fulfilled. I picture a few ladies sitting around the table at a coffee shop sipping lattes and laughing and ending with a nice prayer. That is not reality. The reality of friendship is that it is often messy and it has to be intentional. In order to make a difference and develop genuine relationships you have to get in the trenches of sadness, grief, anxiety, depression, neediness, pride, and every other sin that we face as believers and unbelievers. And having a fellow Christian friend does not exempt you from conflict, you cannot ignore it. Over time our own weaknesses, struggles, and areas of pride and selfishness will be revealed. It is hard and challenging and grows you as a believer. But, friendships can be one of the greatest methods of sanctification. As you learn to be a Godly friend, serving the needs of others the Lord will grow you to be more like Him.
One of the things we as believers (or I, honestly speaking) are tempted to do is cut ourselves off from the task of caring for people who demand more attention than we are wanting to give. (Or, when I’m overwhelmed by life, or just the desire to be alone, I cut myself off from those who support me the most)
- It reveals a weakness.
- No one can know.
- They won’t love me.
- I just want to be alone.
- It’s too messy.
- They are too needy.
- It’s not comfortable.
- They require way more grace than I have.
- I don’t have the time.
But God does not call us to only develop relationships with those we like or with whom we share the same interests. He calls us to love all those who are lost, even those who are messy, needy, or need extra grace. Because, at the end of the day, we are messy, needy and require extra grace. We love others not because it rewards us, but because our love shows others Christ living in us. In fact Paul goes so far as to say that our purpose as believers is to build up our neighbor, not to please ourselves (15:1-2). He uses Christ as the ultimate example of this. As Christ welcomes us as sinners, we should also welcome the weak. Our reward is that we have been accepted by Christ and just as Christ showed compassion and mercy on us we are to share it with others.
What kind of friend are you? Are you attentive, intentional, loving, and supportive? How can you grow in your relationships?
Considering Tele-therapy?
Christian Mom Counseling provides professional counseling via virtual teletherapy for women located in the state of North Carolina. We utilize real-time video to have sessions with women all over the state of NC. There are multiple reasons why and here are a few:
- As a mom of three, I understand the difficulty of scheduling and making time for myself. I’ve found that many other mothers who are in the early childhood stage of motherhood find scheduling online sessions easier and more feasible. Save time on travel and sitters and schedule online.
- You can attend your session even if you are sick without the risk of exposing anyone else!
- It’s a good option if you live in a remote area that makes finding a counselor close to you difficult.
- My primary specialty is faith-based Christian Counseling. That being said, many of my clients have commented on their inability to find counselors who claim to be Christian and include faith as a major part of the client’s healing and recovery.
- Virtual Counseling is here to stay and studies have shown that in many cases tele-therapy can be equally as effective. You will always hear me recommend in person interpersonal connections (family, friends, church, small groups, and other forms of deep relationships with others) but online counseling can provide many of the same advantages of in-person counseling.
If you’ve been wondering if tele-therapy would be a good fit I’d love to hear from you! Click the button below to form to schedule a free phone consultation:
